Monday, December 26, 2011
Thursday, December 15, 2011
My Walk
As I look back over my "walk" I see religion-condemnation-religion etc. I feel like I started my walk in grace (that fateful wednesday night) and because of my lack of understanding, insecurities, my fatherhood complex, feelings of inadequacies, insignificance (not to mention false doctrine) that quickly turned into self- righteousness. (Galatians 3:1-6) And honestly, I don't know how to put my walk in the proper light, but I DO know that Jesus has shown mercy, grace and provision though it all!!
You see I'm guilty of A LOT!! Before I was saved (SIN!), after I was saved (SIN & SELF-RIGHTEOUSNESS!), but I trust and hope in the sacrifice Jesus made and the mercy HE extends..... My walk has been a wild, crazy journey and I believe that I'm just truly getting started, as God is making sense of all the stuff that I can't make sense of. As HE is shining HIS light into certain places, changing my heart and views, renewing me day by day..... I have a looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooong way to go, but I know that with a faithful God as the one I know and love I will make it to my destination....
God is Dope,
Dooch
You see I'm guilty of A LOT!! Before I was saved (SIN!), after I was saved (SIN & SELF-RIGHTEOUSNESS!), but I trust and hope in the sacrifice Jesus made and the mercy HE extends..... My walk has been a wild, crazy journey and I believe that I'm just truly getting started, as God is making sense of all the stuff that I can't make sense of. As HE is shining HIS light into certain places, changing my heart and views, renewing me day by day..... I have a looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooong way to go, but I know that with a faithful God as the one I know and love I will make it to my destination....
God is Dope,
Dooch
Tuesday, November 29, 2011
Perishable Goods
What's goodie peoples?
About a year or so ago I started a looong decline from the higher parts of the mountain down to the low valley. A strenuous hike it has been! It has gotten more and more intense as the minutes turned into hours, the hours into days, the days to weeks, the weeks to months and now the months to a year. ( Hopefully the year won't turn into years! lol)
But during this time, I have lost A LOT of what I thought I had, a lot of my passion, desire and zealousness (at least how I understood it). I've lost companions, I've lost doctrinal stances/dogmas, I've lost a lot of things but I've also gained some things......
I've gotten past all the religious masks etc down to me... just me... and a lot of the stuff I see is... well, lets just say nasty.
It's safe to say I've been stripped down bare, butt naked..... To the point where ALL I have and ALL I cling to is Jesus and HIS atonement... Nothing more, nothing less.... Faith in Jesus is it!!
Now, one may say this is a GREAT thing! And I believe that to be true, ALTHOUGH it doesn't FEEL so great. It has constantly felt like I have been perishing through this period, like I have been rotting away, being eaten alive from the inside out.
I don't know if any of you have ever felt that way, it's not a good feeling! Lol. I felt as if I was holding on with all I had but one by one my fingers kept loosing grip, and I feared that one day I would just all together lose grip and fall away, until...........
Mark 4:
On that day, when evening had come, he said to them, "Let us go across to the other side." 36And leaving the crowd, they took him with them in the boat, just as he was. And other boats were with him. 37And a great windstorm arose, and the waves were breaking into the boat, so that the boat was already filling. 38But he was in the stern, asleep on the cushion. And they woke him and said to him, "Teacher, do you not care that we are perishing?" 39And he awoke and rebuked the wind and said to the sea, "Peace! Be still!" And the wind ceased, and there was a great calm. 40He said to them, "Why are you so afraid? Have you still no faith?" 41And they were filled with great fear and said to one another, "Who then is this, that even the wind and the sea obey him?"
I always knew Jesus was with me through this, I saw HIS hands all over but HIS presence wasn't as close as it has been before.... I identify with the disciples, I felt (and still do A lot of times) that HE was (is) sleeping, while I was perishing............ But Jesus comforted and encouraged me one day by showing me how he just got up when they woke him and rebuked the winds and great peace came..
HE asked them why were they so afraid.... HE wasn't worried about it, neither should they have been... And that gave me GREAT comfort and hope!! Jesus was carrying me, HE was right there with me, protecting me and with HIM I have nothing to worry about... At any given moment HE can demand all the storms to stop and at the drop of a dime they will!!
Now, HE hasn't done that in my life at this moment, I'm still faced with tons of storms, I still feel a lot of times like I'm perishing, but no longer like I'm loosing grip.... I know that I'm with Christ and HE is carrying me and holding me...
God is Dope!!
Dooch
P.S.
Maybe the perishing is just the pruning that John 15 speaks about....... Maybe it is, maybe it isn't, I guess I may know in hindsight. Until then, I'm clinging to Christ!
About a year or so ago I started a looong decline from the higher parts of the mountain down to the low valley. A strenuous hike it has been! It has gotten more and more intense as the minutes turned into hours, the hours into days, the days to weeks, the weeks to months and now the months to a year. ( Hopefully the year won't turn into years! lol)
But during this time, I have lost A LOT of what I thought I had, a lot of my passion, desire and zealousness (at least how I understood it). I've lost companions, I've lost doctrinal stances/dogmas, I've lost a lot of things but I've also gained some things......
I've gotten past all the religious masks etc down to me... just me... and a lot of the stuff I see is... well, lets just say nasty.
It's safe to say I've been stripped down bare, butt naked..... To the point where ALL I have and ALL I cling to is Jesus and HIS atonement... Nothing more, nothing less.... Faith in Jesus is it!!
Now, one may say this is a GREAT thing! And I believe that to be true, ALTHOUGH it doesn't FEEL so great. It has constantly felt like I have been perishing through this period, like I have been rotting away, being eaten alive from the inside out.
I don't know if any of you have ever felt that way, it's not a good feeling! Lol. I felt as if I was holding on with all I had but one by one my fingers kept loosing grip, and I feared that one day I would just all together lose grip and fall away, until...........
Mark 4:
On that day, when evening had come, he said to them, "Let us go across to the other side." 36And leaving the crowd, they took him with them in the boat, just as he was. And other boats were with him. 37And a great windstorm arose, and the waves were breaking into the boat, so that the boat was already filling. 38But he was in the stern, asleep on the cushion. And they woke him and said to him, "Teacher, do you not care that we are perishing?" 39And he awoke and rebuked the wind and said to the sea, "Peace! Be still!" And the wind ceased, and there was a great calm. 40He said to them, "Why are you so afraid? Have you still no faith?" 41And they were filled with great fear and said to one another, "Who then is this, that even the wind and the sea obey him?"
I always knew Jesus was with me through this, I saw HIS hands all over but HIS presence wasn't as close as it has been before.... I identify with the disciples, I felt (and still do A lot of times) that HE was (is) sleeping, while I was perishing............ But Jesus comforted and encouraged me one day by showing me how he just got up when they woke him and rebuked the winds and great peace came..
HE asked them why were they so afraid.... HE wasn't worried about it, neither should they have been... And that gave me GREAT comfort and hope!! Jesus was carrying me, HE was right there with me, protecting me and with HIM I have nothing to worry about... At any given moment HE can demand all the storms to stop and at the drop of a dime they will!!
Now, HE hasn't done that in my life at this moment, I'm still faced with tons of storms, I still feel a lot of times like I'm perishing, but no longer like I'm loosing grip.... I know that I'm with Christ and HE is carrying me and holding me...
God is Dope!!
Dooch
P.S.
Maybe the perishing is just the pruning that John 15 speaks about....... Maybe it is, maybe it isn't, I guess I may know in hindsight. Until then, I'm clinging to Christ!
Monday, November 28, 2011
Monday, November 21, 2011
Sunday, November 20, 2011
Wednesday, November 16, 2011
Catching Up
Catching Up
Soooooo, it's been a long while since I touched down with a blog..... Well, I've missed ya'll too! lol :)
A lot has happened within the past year, so here is a blog on me helping you all catch up with me. On June 7, 2011 my wife had our 4th child, Joshua Emmanuel Cook. He was born healthy and beautiful, and he was the last of our family. We were done having kids...... Sad to say on August 8, 2011 our baby boy died, unexpectedly and unannounced from SIDS... His death has caused us to go on a CRAZY journey spiritually, hanging on the cross of Christ for our lives..... We've been through A LOT!! My wife has had about 7 miscarriages throughout our 10 years together, but losing our baby that we held, kissed, changed, bathed, smelled, hugged and so on was TRULY different.
It's been a process that we have been walking out towards healing, a HARD arduous experience.
Other than that, all of you or some of you may know that I've been on my music grind hard. I put out "Certified" my first mix tape in January of 2011 and now I'm on schedule to release my second mix tape "My Lot" on January 1, 2012. With the first video and single off the mixtape debuting on November 21..
This process has been EXTREMELY hard as well, starting and building from the ground up isn't a easy thing. People have a hard time giving unknown artist or "nobodies" a chance of which I fall into that category. So all around it's been a VERY hard journey for me through this past year.
Concerning my faith....... I've reached a place where I look at where the church (the western church) is and I'm disgusted. I'm not satisfied with what I see and I want more of what true christianity is. I don't want to be involved with a lot of the stuff I see and or hear, I don't want to be around the fakes and the phonies, I don't want to be around the pharisees and sadduccees, I don't want to be around the zealouts who have no grace, mercy or compassion. I realize more and more just how sick I am and how much I need a physician to heal me and save me. And Jesus is that doctor. I realize more and more how I have NOTHING to offer HIM, even my body isn't much of anything unless HE stirs me up and uses me HIMSELF!!!
So, here's a quick catch up, just like 2 Corinthians 3:3 says, " Your very lives are a letter that anyone can read by just looking at you. Christ himself wrote it—not with ink, but with God's living Spirit; not chiseled into stone, but carved into human lives—and we publish it."
So, here I am, again, the good, the bad and the ugly all wrapped up into a fallen body that has been redeemed by the perfect one -JESUS..
But through ALL this trouble and turmoil, I have one thing that I do know and it's set in concrete, and that's
GOD IS DOPE!!!!!!!
Soooooo, it's been a long while since I touched down with a blog..... Well, I've missed ya'll too! lol :)
A lot has happened within the past year, so here is a blog on me helping you all catch up with me. On June 7, 2011 my wife had our 4th child, Joshua Emmanuel Cook. He was born healthy and beautiful, and he was the last of our family. We were done having kids...... Sad to say on August 8, 2011 our baby boy died, unexpectedly and unannounced from SIDS... His death has caused us to go on a CRAZY journey spiritually, hanging on the cross of Christ for our lives..... We've been through A LOT!! My wife has had about 7 miscarriages throughout our 10 years together, but losing our baby that we held, kissed, changed, bathed, smelled, hugged and so on was TRULY different.
It's been a process that we have been walking out towards healing, a HARD arduous experience.
Other than that, all of you or some of you may know that I've been on my music grind hard. I put out "Certified" my first mix tape in January of 2011 and now I'm on schedule to release my second mix tape "My Lot" on January 1, 2012. With the first video and single off the mixtape debuting on November 21..
This process has been EXTREMELY hard as well, starting and building from the ground up isn't a easy thing. People have a hard time giving unknown artist or "nobodies" a chance of which I fall into that category. So all around it's been a VERY hard journey for me through this past year.
Concerning my faith....... I've reached a place where I look at where the church (the western church) is and I'm disgusted. I'm not satisfied with what I see and I want more of what true christianity is. I don't want to be involved with a lot of the stuff I see and or hear, I don't want to be around the fakes and the phonies, I don't want to be around the pharisees and sadduccees, I don't want to be around the zealouts who have no grace, mercy or compassion. I realize more and more just how sick I am and how much I need a physician to heal me and save me. And Jesus is that doctor. I realize more and more how I have NOTHING to offer HIM, even my body isn't much of anything unless HE stirs me up and uses me HIMSELF!!!
So, here's a quick catch up, just like 2 Corinthians 3:3 says, " Your very lives are a letter that anyone can read by just looking at you. Christ himself wrote it—not with ink, but with God's living Spirit; not chiseled into stone, but carved into human lives—and we publish it."
So, here I am, again, the good, the bad and the ugly all wrapped up into a fallen body that has been redeemed by the perfect one -JESUS..
But through ALL this trouble and turmoil, I have one thing that I do know and it's set in concrete, and that's
GOD IS DOPE!!!!!!!
Wednesday, June 29, 2011
A Fresh Start
What's up Family?
So last night I was on the internet on all hip hop dot com, staying up on what's current in Hip Hop as I regularly do and I had a flashback so to say. I was taken back to 6 years ago when I first gave my life to Christ. Back then when I first started walking in the faith me and my wife gave up EVERYTHING, and I DO MEAN EVERYTHING! Family, friends, habits, tv, music, activities you name it and we turned our backs on it and walked away from it. But every now and again I would sneak on the computer and look at all hip hop. I would do it secretly full of shame and condemnation, like a porn addict looking at porn.
You see at that time I was a new born babe in the faith, and I knew absolutely nothing at all! I had NO idea of all the pain and turmoil the next 6 years would bring my way. You see I feel as if I have been raped, molested and screwed by the "church" and "doctrine" time and time again. We back at that time were members of a prosperity church where we were indoctrinated with lies. Which amplified my religiousness and hypocritical-ness. I was super religious, full of insecurities, acceptance issues, pain, confusion, distortion and more! Looking for a father in my pastors who always seemed to let me down, seeking things that God never promised to any of us. Walking a long hard walk!!!
Thru these years God has walked me thru most of all these things, clearing my sight, freeing me, teaching me grace, allowing me to be able to trust Him and showing me that He and ONLY He is a father to the fatherless. He has been slowly but surely picking up all these pieces that have been broken and taken from me. The innocence I had as a new believer that I feel was snatched from me.
As I sat at that computer last night and had that flashback I felt as if God said, "You are starting all over from there. Before all the non sense came into the picture. When you were fresh and void of the doctrine of man and their folly. You are starting over."
That blew me away! Especially when I think about all that I've learned in and during this time. I've learned that God is my Father, to look to, trust in and depend on Him and Him ONLY- NOT MAN! To not just take what people say but test and weigh it before I accept it, to not just accept cliches from people and not to speak that to people. To not be fake but to be me without all the christianese. God knows the real me, and He accepts the real me. I don't have to hide or conceal anything at all! BIG or small......
I'm me, melancholy, my emotional disposition is pessimistic but hey it's all good! God loves me the same! That's how I'm made, I have good days, I have bad days, so be it. I'm me and that's all I can be.
He started me over and with a lot of wisdom and insight on what to do, and what to avoid. And it's not All Hip Hop! HAHA
But I read something from Job out of the message that spoke along the lines of how I felt/feel.
Job 42:5-6 (Message)
"I admit I once lived by rumors of You, now I have it all first hand- from my own eyes and ears! I'm sorry- forgive me. I'll never do that again, I promise! I'll never again live on crusts of hearsay, crumbs of rumor."
Nope! I'm starting off fresh and seeking God and Him alone.
God is dope,
Israel
So last night I was on the internet on all hip hop dot com, staying up on what's current in Hip Hop as I regularly do and I had a flashback so to say. I was taken back to 6 years ago when I first gave my life to Christ. Back then when I first started walking in the faith me and my wife gave up EVERYTHING, and I DO MEAN EVERYTHING! Family, friends, habits, tv, music, activities you name it and we turned our backs on it and walked away from it. But every now and again I would sneak on the computer and look at all hip hop. I would do it secretly full of shame and condemnation, like a porn addict looking at porn.
You see at that time I was a new born babe in the faith, and I knew absolutely nothing at all! I had NO idea of all the pain and turmoil the next 6 years would bring my way. You see I feel as if I have been raped, molested and screwed by the "church" and "doctrine" time and time again. We back at that time were members of a prosperity church where we were indoctrinated with lies. Which amplified my religiousness and hypocritical-ness. I was super religious, full of insecurities, acceptance issues, pain, confusion, distortion and more! Looking for a father in my pastors who always seemed to let me down, seeking things that God never promised to any of us. Walking a long hard walk!!!
Thru these years God has walked me thru most of all these things, clearing my sight, freeing me, teaching me grace, allowing me to be able to trust Him and showing me that He and ONLY He is a father to the fatherless. He has been slowly but surely picking up all these pieces that have been broken and taken from me. The innocence I had as a new believer that I feel was snatched from me.
As I sat at that computer last night and had that flashback I felt as if God said, "You are starting all over from there. Before all the non sense came into the picture. When you were fresh and void of the doctrine of man and their folly. You are starting over."
That blew me away! Especially when I think about all that I've learned in and during this time. I've learned that God is my Father, to look to, trust in and depend on Him and Him ONLY- NOT MAN! To not just take what people say but test and weigh it before I accept it, to not just accept cliches from people and not to speak that to people. To not be fake but to be me without all the christianese. God knows the real me, and He accepts the real me. I don't have to hide or conceal anything at all! BIG or small......
I'm me, melancholy, my emotional disposition is pessimistic but hey it's all good! God loves me the same! That's how I'm made, I have good days, I have bad days, so be it. I'm me and that's all I can be.
He started me over and with a lot of wisdom and insight on what to do, and what to avoid. And it's not All Hip Hop! HAHA
But I read something from Job out of the message that spoke along the lines of how I felt/feel.
Job 42:5-6 (Message)
"I admit I once lived by rumors of You, now I have it all first hand- from my own eyes and ears! I'm sorry- forgive me. I'll never do that again, I promise! I'll never again live on crusts of hearsay, crumbs of rumor."
Nope! I'm starting off fresh and seeking God and Him alone.
God is dope,
Israel
Friday, June 24, 2011
Tuesday, June 21, 2011
Oh You Hypocrite!
What's poppin? Crackin? Shakin? Good? And all the that good stuff!!!
God is dope peoples!! He truly is the dopest thing around! Any way check it out, have you ever saw yourself as a hypocrite? You know one of those people who are always coming down on others when they do the same thing? No???? Well, maybe I'm the only one screwed up enough that I find myself being a hypocrite at times.
There are two different definitions to the word by Merriam Webster:
1: a person who puts on a false appearance of virtue or religion;
2: a person who acts in contradiction to his or her stated beliefs or feelings.
Now, although I have been guilty of definition number one many times, today we are talking about definiton two. So to all the holy rollers you can catch ya breath!!!
This morning I was putting together a lesson about rap and how some rappers have abstract lyrics. Abstract in case you don't know is just something that can be difficult to understand, it can be subtle or covered up. A meaning behind a meaning, message behind a message you get the point. Well, I was doing this lesson and as I was writing it I was at odds with these abstract rappers, mad at their "cowardice" and the fact that they would push evil, and some even demonic propaganda through their music and make it abstract so that many would not understand it. Then as I was finishing up the lesson God revealed to me that I do the same thing!!!!!!!!!
There are songs I have that I never mention Jesus or God but I talk about the kingdom of God and a christian worldview in a subtle way. And by no means is their anything wrong with doing this but for me to condemn and judge them when I do the same is hypocritical. So after I finished laughing at myself I asked for forgiveness and was in an "Wow, I'm so stupid" moment!!" I know right. Crazy!!
The bible speaks on this topic in the context of both of the definitions. But we are going to look at this text for the principle behind it!!
Matthew 7:1-5 (Message)
"Don't pick on people, jump on their failures, criticize their faults— unless, of course, you want the same treatment. That critical spirit has a way of boomeranging. It's easy to see a smudge on your neighbor's face and be oblivious to the ugly sneer on your own. Do you have the nerve to say, 'Let me wash your face for you,' when your own face is distorted by contempt? It's this whole traveling road-show mentality all over again, playing a holier-than-thou part instead of just living your part. Wipe that ugly sneer off your own face, and you might be fit to offer a washcloth to your neighbor.
While I'm here knocking them I do the same thing!! Oh You Hyprocrite!! Any way praise God for His goodness and faithfulness to reveal to me what I couldn't see!!!
God is dope,
Israel
God is dope peoples!! He truly is the dopest thing around! Any way check it out, have you ever saw yourself as a hypocrite? You know one of those people who are always coming down on others when they do the same thing? No???? Well, maybe I'm the only one screwed up enough that I find myself being a hypocrite at times.
There are two different definitions to the word by Merriam Webster:
1: a person who puts on a false appearance of virtue or religion;
2: a person who acts in contradiction to his or her stated beliefs or feelings.
Now, although I have been guilty of definition number one many times, today we are talking about definiton two. So to all the holy rollers you can catch ya breath!!!
This morning I was putting together a lesson about rap and how some rappers have abstract lyrics. Abstract in case you don't know is just something that can be difficult to understand, it can be subtle or covered up. A meaning behind a meaning, message behind a message you get the point. Well, I was doing this lesson and as I was writing it I was at odds with these abstract rappers, mad at their "cowardice" and the fact that they would push evil, and some even demonic propaganda through their music and make it abstract so that many would not understand it. Then as I was finishing up the lesson God revealed to me that I do the same thing!!!!!!!!!
There are songs I have that I never mention Jesus or God but I talk about the kingdom of God and a christian worldview in a subtle way. And by no means is their anything wrong with doing this but for me to condemn and judge them when I do the same is hypocritical. So after I finished laughing at myself I asked for forgiveness and was in an "Wow, I'm so stupid" moment!!" I know right. Crazy!!
The bible speaks on this topic in the context of both of the definitions. But we are going to look at this text for the principle behind it!!
Matthew 7:1-5 (Message)
"Don't pick on people, jump on their failures, criticize their faults— unless, of course, you want the same treatment. That critical spirit has a way of boomeranging. It's easy to see a smudge on your neighbor's face and be oblivious to the ugly sneer on your own. Do you have the nerve to say, 'Let me wash your face for you,' when your own face is distorted by contempt? It's this whole traveling road-show mentality all over again, playing a holier-than-thou part instead of just living your part. Wipe that ugly sneer off your own face, and you might be fit to offer a washcloth to your neighbor.
While I'm here knocking them I do the same thing!! Oh You Hyprocrite!! Any way praise God for His goodness and faithfulness to reveal to me what I couldn't see!!!
God is dope,
Israel
Thursday, May 26, 2011
God is dope!
WHat's up fam???? So the other day I was reading Gods holy word about Abraham sending his top servant to find a wife for his son Isaac. And to make a long story short the servant goes as commanded and he prays to God a specific prayer and directly after he finishes God answers his prayer in the exact way he prayed it! He is invited into Rachels house by her brother Laban and her mother and welcomed for dinner and to spend the night. Let's read what happens next from here:
Genesis 24:34-51
The servant said, "I'm the servant of Abraham. God has blessed my master—he's a great man; God has given him sheep and cattle, silver and gold, servants and maidservants, camels and donkeys. And then to top it off, Sarah, my master's wife, gave him a son in her old age and he has passed everything on to his son. My master made me promise, 'Don't get a wife for my son from the daughters of the Canaanites in whose land I live. No, go to my father's home, back to my family, and get a wife for my son there.' I said to my master, 'But what if the woman won't come with me?' He said, 'God before whom I've walked faithfully will send his angel with you and he'll make things work out so that you'll bring back a wife for my son from my family, from the house of my father. Then you'll be free from the oath. If you go to my family and they won't give her to you, you will also be free from the oath.'
42-44 "Well, when I came this very day to the spring, I prayed, 'God, God of my master Abraham, make things turn out well in this task I've been given. I'm standing at this well. When a young woman comes here to draw water and I say to her, Please, give me a sip of water from your jug, and she says, Not only will I give you a drink, I'll also water your camels—let that woman be the wife God has picked out for my master's son.'
45-48 "I had barely finished offering this prayer, when Rebekah arrived, her jug on her shoulder. She went to the spring and drew water and I said, 'Please, can I have a drink?' She didn't hesitate. She held out her jug and said, 'Drink; and when you're finished I'll also water your camels.' I drank, and she watered the camels. I asked her, 'Whose daughter are you?' She said, 'The daughter of Bethuel whose parents were Nahor and Milcah.' I gave her a ring for her nose, bracelets for her arms, and bowed in worship to God. I praised God, the God of my master Abraham who had led me straight to the door of my master's family to get a wife for his son.
49 "Now, tell me what you are going to do. If you plan to respond with a generous yes, tell me. But if not, tell me plainly so I can figure out what to do next."
50-51 Laban and Bethuel answered, "This is totally from God. We have no say in the matter, either yes or no. Rebekah is yours: Take her and go; let her be the wife of your master's son, as God has made plain."
So here goes why I give you all this, we have bumped into a few roadblocks with our ministry, and was seeking some guidance from God on it. It's funny because I got a email the other day from one of my mentors and he said, "we should go the non profit route......" And I took my phone out of my pocket to call my wife and talk to her about it. As soon as I flipped open my phone to call my wife I get a text from my wife and it reads, "we should do non profit.... pray and think about it...."
I was floored because the first thing I thought about was the passage that I had just read earlier. I called my wife and has the same response Laban and his mother did! "This is totally from God. We have no say in the matter, either yes or no." It was a no brainer! God was obviously already planning on doing it and doing it!!!!
That was a good and encouraging moment seeing scripture play out for me like it did in that story!!!! I just praised God for blessing me with an encouraging experience like that!
God is dope!!!!!! God is dope!!!!!
Israel
Thursday, May 19, 2011
Prayer
Yep Yep, What it is!!!!!
So peep this peoples, about 8 or 9 months ago I took a exam and about a third of the classes tests were lost. And I prayed when it was announced that God allow the test to be found. In the mean time we had to set up another date to take the exam over, that was set for the next week. The morning of the re take (if that's even a word! lol) I was struggling on whether or not my prayers are answered, or even heard at all! I was struggling with my faith and the assurance of my salvation. I cried out to God that morning in despair and asked for help.
As the day went on and I went to go take the exam I just 'knew' that they had found them, which by the grace of God AND answer to prayer they did!!!!! I was overjoyed and encouraged at this which didn't last long. Soon after the enemy rushed in with the doubts: "that was just coincidence, that has nothing to do with your prayers, they would have been found either way yada yada yada." And this dampened my spirit and stifled my joy. Needless to say I was defeated........
Another situation, as I've been walking in and by faith I've struggled with and been attacked with the notion that I'm not 'praying' enough about the stuff I'm doing and it isn't 'God' behind it and so on. Well as I was reading through my journal from 2009 when I was on a missions trip in Nepal I was praying about the exact stuff I'm doing rght now and I believed God was showing me then what He wanted from me which is what I'm doing now. This was like wow! Because I'd forgotten all about it! I was amazed at seeing what God was showing me years ago and what I prayed then was being rolled out today without me even recognizing it!
Now the fun part!!! As I was reading C.S. Lewis today God spoke to me and ministered to / encouraged me sooo much!!!! The book in reference is Screwtape Letters, it's a book where a high ranking demon is coaching/discipling his nephew an in experienced younger demon on how to tempt/ manipulate and secure the soul of the human he is assigned to. The first passage that hit me reads as follows, ".....he (the human) will probaly continue such crude prayers whatever you do. But you can worry him with the haunting suspicion that the practice is absurd and can have no objective result. Don't forget to use the 'heads I win, tails you lose' argument. If the thing he prys for doesn't happen, then that is no more proof that petitionary prayers don't work; if it does happen he will, ofcourse, be able to see some of the physical causes which led up to it, and therefore it would have happened anyway and thus a granted prayer becomes just as good a proof as a denied one that prayers are ineffective."
This refers to my first story. I was attacked with the argument it would have happened either way, it was a coincidence. So that granted prayer that God providentially set up to happen that specific day I was struggling to encourage and affirm me was used to discourage and defeat me because of the tactics of satan. WHOA!!!!!! Crazy huh?
The second part refers to the second story, " If you tried to explain to him (the human) that men's prayers today are one of the innumerable co ordinates with which the Enemy (referring to God) harmonises the weather of tomorrow........."
This was crazy because my prayers 2 years ago played a part in what is going on now. My prayers then were used by Our Great God to harmonize the weather for today! That is dope!!!!!!!! SO what God did to me/in me with this is affirm some stuff and confirm some stuff. He gave me some insight for future battles and He gave me a incredible confidence and new faith in the power of prayer!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Yessir! I'm on my 1 Thessalonians 5:17
Praying without ceasing!
You should be tooo!
God is dope,
Israel
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
My faith has been greatly increased!!!!
So last night I was talking to a 62 year old lady who loves the Lord sooooooo much! This lady was our neighbor in our last neighborhood. The interesting thing about this lady is that she is a shut in. She has NEVER been married and has never had any children. She is all alone, stuck inside of her 3rd floor apartment and can't even leave. She has very bad physical health issues and only is able to leave 1nce or twice a month. She has never traveled outside of Lynchburg, in fact she has never seen the whole city of Lynchburg!!!!!!! That's crazy as small as this city is!!!!!! But this woman is a great woman of faith, who just prays for people and the neighborhood all the time.
Me spending 40 minutes with her on the phone last night has greatly increased my faith, as she was telling me testimonies of her life and the power of prayer. The conviction and power of her words alone were filled with the spirit of God that I just wanted to cry! Even as I told her how great of a woman of God and faith she was she humbly told me how she only has faith the size of a mustard seed. And how she has been sick and in constant pain, non stop for the past 28 years and has in the last few years struggled with why God would allow that when He has given her a heart to want to serve so much. (She said she would love to join a church and even clean bathrooms and scrub floors in the church!) and other people who don't even care or think about Him are healthly but living in debauchery. I was thinking that alone is a testament of faith in that she would still trust and serve God faithfully for 28 years despite all the hurt and pain!!! INCREDIBLE!!!!!!!!!! She kept saying this is the only way satan cn attack her, being that she has nothing and no one else that he can use to get to her.
Anyway she told me how she rests in that God has comforted in her in that even in the midst of her disability God has used her greatly to minister to others, just like me last night! Now, I doubt she has led anyone to Christ, but I am not as naive to believe that she will not be richly rewarded once she gets to heaven. I got off the phone with her last night encouraged, renewed, stregthened and infused with a new deeper faith!!!!!!!!!
I was skceptical, unbelieving, fed up with "christians" and our overly spiritual, self righteous selves and God used this little old lady who many have forgotten to pour into me greatly and to stand me back on my feet! OH WHAT A MIGHTY GOD WE SERVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I'm so thankful to God for His faithfulness!!!!
This is just a testimony or shall I say praise report people!!!!! Praise Him for He is good and He is worthy of it!!!!!
1 Thessalonians 5:
23 Now may the God of peace himself sanctify you completely, and may your wholespirit and soul and body be kept blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ. 24 He who calls you is faithful; he will surely do it.
God is dope,
Israel
Pray for her as you remember her, her name is Ms. Phyllis Thomas
Saturday, May 7, 2011
Missions???????????????
Send me I'll GO! These are the words of rapper Lecrae, the exact words we should be crying out to God because He has told us to go into ALL the world and make disciples... This should include your immediate neighborhood, work, the inner city, and the world at large.......... Yessir! So, I want to encourage all to examine themselves and see what God would have them to do missionally..... The fact of the matter is this, we ALL should be involved in local and international missions, whether through prayer, financial support, or serving there. There is NO way out of it!!!!!!! So below is a recent video that I did for a missions group that serves in Central Asia, they serve the Muslim people there and are in need of missionaries, especially people of an urban background and of minority ethnicities. Check it out then check them out!!!!!!!!!
www.gowave.info or
www.gopeople.org
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=72lXlphZ09g
God is dope,
Israel
Friday, April 29, 2011
Thursday, April 28, 2011
My Struggle
Wassup Family,
It's been a lil minute so let's jump right into it peoples!!!! The past few weeks I've been really struggling with being content with where God has me. I've been looking at my financial situation and been thinking and planning on every scheme in the world to come up! Literally it's been a EVERYDAY battle for me the past few weeks. Everyday I struggle and battle and then God encourages me for that day and the next day it's on and poppin again! I struggled with scriptures like 1 Timothy 6:6,
"Now there is great gain in godliness with contentment"
and scriptures like Proverbs 15:16-17,
" Better is a little with the fear of the LORD, than great treasure and trouble with it. Better is a dinner of herbs where love is than a fattened ox and hatred with it."
Or scriptures like Psalm 37:16 or Proverbs 16:8 for that matter. To make this a little more personal let me give you a little background of myself. I am a man that lives totally by faith! In every sense of the word!!!!!! God takes care of my family LITERALLY! I dont make the kind of money to support a family of soon to be 6, in fact I live by off of 4 dollars a day. Really...... If I lived in India or other impoverished nations I'd be well off, where most of the people in those nations live off of 2 dollars or under a day. But I'm not... I'm in the U.S. of A where things are totally different..... But in the midst of this I live a life that is well provided for, people always say how God is their Jehova-Jireh (which they say means the Lord is my provider, but it really means the Lord will see to it) But I TRULY know HIM as this in a very deeep and personal way. He sees to ALL our needs and to some of our wants as well.
So what's the issue? Living by faith is extremely HARD!!!!!!!!!! It's no cakewalk peoples!!!!!! It's simple and easy to just have money in reserves, or in the savings and not to have to trust God to provide in every situation. And a lot of times I want that easiness and comfort but God has been saying uh uh, I have you where I want you. I was reading an essay one day though and God spoke to me through it. He showed me my feebleness and lack of trust in His provision and providence. A quote by John Yoder that stated,
" Jahweh has always taken care of us in the past; should we not be able to trust His providence for the immediate future?"
This quote rocked me and my "lack of trust" and it encouraged me for that day (lol)......... But again I battled with it a couple days later and a turning point came last night for me as I was looking at a once prominent christian turned secular rapper from Houston Texas. In the 90's he was used by God to turn many to Christ and to make many strides in Christian rap and now he is a secular rapper talking about the money girls and everything else. And he spoke about how he started making all this money doing christian rap and unknowingly drifted away from Jesus and began to depend on the money. And lo and behold he is where he is now. That sealed the deal for me! I don't want to end up where he is at, so I prayed that if God wanted me to stay in the place I'm at I would love to. I know that right now I'm TOTALLY dependant on Jesus (which is what He wants) and I don't put it pass myself that if I had more money I wouldn't trust in Him like I do.
So, I'm content in that God is in control and I'm where He has me. And I'm soaking up other scriptures as well that God is using to minister to me with like these:
"Better is a poor man who walks in his integrity
than a rich man who is crooked in his ways." (Proverbs 28:6)
" A rich man is wise in his own eyes,
but a poor man who has understanding will find him out." (Proverbs 28:11)
And my prayer today is that of Agur: "Two things I ask of you; deny them not to me before I die: Remove far from me falsehood and lying; give me neither poverty nor riches; feed me with the food that is needful for me, lest I be full and deny you and say, "Who is the LORD?" or lest I be poor and steal and profane the name of my God."
In Jesus Name
God is dope,
Amen
Thursday, April 14, 2011
Wednesday, April 6, 2011
Tuesday, April 5, 2011
Sunday, April 3, 2011
I Don't Know it All
What up family,
I hope all is well with you all at this current time! God is Dope yo, and although we shouldn't need to be reminded of that we almost always need to be! Frail, helpless, miserable human beings we are! I'm grateful that God is mindful of that! Psalm 78:39
Anywho Let's get it peoples!!!!!!! God has provided me with a great team that surronds me, brothers and a sister that Love God with ALL their heart and who have a desire to serve others and they are VERY missional minded! One of them is my brother who was a missionary overseas for 13 years! He is really a blessing in that God is using all that He poured into him to pour into me. I'm learning sooooo much of what to do and what not to do through him. It's truly a blessing to be walking with and learning from him.
Now, the thing is this, he's a white country boy who's 30 years older than I! (No offense brother! Love you!) and I'm a hood dude. And he has frequently stated how he would have never thought he would be doing ANYTHING that involves rap! But praise God that he has a heart for God because as longs as it promotes the gospel and reaches the lost he's down with it! But lately I've been seeing myself get kind of aggy, irritated or frustrated with some of the stuff he has suggessted or asked me to do.
For instance, we are putting a project together for his missional organization and he asked me to give him a copy of ALL the lyrics to the songs. Mind you, I don't type my rhymes on the computer, so I had to go through all my songs on the cd and type them up. But my feeling was, "man he's doing too much. That's unneccassary. People aint gonna pop the cd into their computer and read the lyrics. He buggin."
Another thing was he suggessted that we put together a certain kind of booklet for kids in the hood (I don't want to let the cat out of the bag!). And my response was, "thats wack, kids aint going to want to read that! They could care less, he doing too much blah blah blah." But I didn't mention any of this to him, it was all stuff that I was wrestling with internally and talking to God and my wife about. I didn't want to be prideful so I would talk to God about it, then my wife (or vice versa) and my wife would always be like, "it won't hurt anything. And it's worth looking into." So I would then give my feelings to God and humbly submit to what was asked or suggested.
And one night as I was praying and pondering on some things God smacked me and said to me, "You don't know everything. How do you know I won't use this?" And that stopped me in my tracks and humbled me, especially because I had a similar incident like this months ago when I first met this brother. A lot of us were doing mulch at our church and I was working with 2 guys I knew and 3 or 4 I didn't. So one of the guys I knew just kept telling the other guys about my testimony and what I had going on in the inner city etc etc. And I was like, "why he talking so much, I don't even know these dudes etc etc." And lo and behold one of the guys who he told about me was this brother and we have put in extensive work since then. God has used him mightily in my life and in the life of my ministry. So that day I was humbled like, "dag! I'm saying dude was talking too much and God was using that the whole time!!!!!!"
So, I truly humbled myself in repentance and confessed that I don't know everything and that I would really take in his as well as other peoples suggestions and the like And I had a meeting with the team a few days after to confess it to him and the whole team. It wasn't a big deal to him but it was to me. It was a BIG lesson learned.
God is able to do over and above, beyond all that we think and/or imagine. More so HE is able to use anything! Especially what we think HE can't use. In fact He loves using the weak and foolish things to confound the strong and wise things! Read it yourself:
1 Corinthians 1
27 But God chose what is foolish in the world to shame the wise; God chose what is weak in the world to shame the strong; 28 God chose what is low and despised in the world, even things that are not, to bring to nothing things that are, 29 so that no human being might boast in the presence of God.
Now, in no way am I saying that my brother or his ideas are weak and foolish, not by a long shot!!!!! And I do know the proper context of this so don't stone me (to all my biblical scholars and theologians lol)! But it's a principle here, and that principle is this:
God uses not what we think HE should use or even what we think HE HAS to use to reach the lost or make something happen. He would rather use something that makes NO SENSE at all so that NO ONE can get the glory but HIM!
I don't know it all, neither do you. I don't know know what God wants to accomplish, HE let's us in on some of it but not to all of it. So my encouragement to you is to humble yourself and to accept counsel, look into what they say really. It doesn't mean that everything is something you have to do, but really look into it with a humble posture and be open. It can't hurt anything! (S/O to my wife Tiesha! Love ya!!!)
Proverbs 11:14
Where there is no guidance, a people falls,
but in an abundance of counselors there is safety
I know I was all over with it today, but cstch the principles people!!!!!!
Until next time (LORD willing)
God is dope,
Israel
Thursday, March 31, 2011
Friday, March 25, 2011
Thursday, March 24, 2011
What kind of success is that?
So, as some of you may know I've been stepping out on faith in planning an event since around November or so. This was a stretch for me in soooo many difeerent ways, especially since I lacked in a major department: FAITH!!!!! This event would cost 1,000 dollars (of which I DID NOT HAVE!) and I was to host it in a venue of wwhich the owner never had rap music and din't want to have anything involving rap in it.
As I took steps God opened up doors left and right, giving me favor with the owner, who allowed me to use his venue for a low price, providing flyers, artwork and a team to get the event done, and most importantly He provided the finances to pay for the event. As I grinded it out to see this event pop ff in faith I was stretched all the more, my faith grew incredibly! And not just mines, but the people close to me as well. God used what was happening in my life to catapult them into action. A lot of fruit that was being produced and it was a joy to walk through it!
Now, a few weeks before the event I started getting phone calls, people telling me that they wouldn't be able to do the event for this or that reason. People who had given me their word MONTHS before that they would do it. This was disappointing but I had to continue pushing with or without people. My boy Rick would say through the whole ordeal, "sometimes you have to be willing to look like a fool for God. If you aren't willing to look foolish for Him He can't use you" So I had made up in my mind that I was willing to do just that if need be. It was no turning back! And as time continued to close in on the date, more and more people backed out until I was the ONLY one to do it. I still proceeded just hoping and praying that others would show up, plus I would have failed if I would have folded because of it. I was determined to ride it out in faith and see it through.
Ok, so the event has come and gone people. And guess what, only one other rapper showed up that night, with about 15-20 attendees. I ended up looking like a fool for Christ, and that bothered me at first as I took my eyes down off of Him and put them on the situation. But God is good, and Is 26:3 tells us that if we keep our eyes on Him He will keep us in perfect peace. Which by the end of the night and especially the next morning I was back in effect! Anyway, we made use of the night, we celebrated Christ, lifted His name high (Njeri what up!!!???), and had a great time!
I got to learn A LOT of stuff that night though. I got to see how un appreciative I was of the people who really supported me and who are going to ride for me through and through. You see, I was more focused on and worried about the people that wasn't there. I was even upset that the people who was there was there! I mean these weren't the people I "wanted" to be there. And God said to me, "I know. But these are the people who are for you and will support you through and through." That was dope! I would not have saw that if everyone had shown up like I wanted.
Also, I and a lot of others had been praying for the owner of the venue for months! And I visioned him hearing the gospel that night and repenting immediately. Well, that didn't happen, he heard the gospel but didn't repent that night. But God showed me something profound (especially if you know this guy!) He's all about his money, every last penny of it, but that night everything I ordered for me and my beautiful wife he didn't let me pay for it. That may seem little but certainly not for him! Also, he took me in private and started asking my advice on whether or not he should open up another shop. I was taken aback like, "I don't own a business you do! Why are you asking me?" But God said to me, "Your relationship with him as gone a step deeper and he will repent." That was enough for me to be encouraged!
We prayed for months that God would be glorified and guess what He was! It didn't turn out how I wanted it to, or thought it should. But God had his way, so I also learned that we must hold stuff loosely.
Anyway, there was more that I learned that night but I'll save that for a later date! All in All the night was a success! So much was learned that NO ONE can take away from me! So much stuff that will be applied to my next event as I continue to walk in faith! Oh yeah, I'm not stopping baby! I'm going to get it in!!!!!!!!!
The suucessful life for the christian is not measured as the world measures succes. It's measured by how obediant and yeilding you are to the Holy Spirit. And I obeyed what God told me to do and I've been changed because of it!
So, brothers and sister, let's look to trust God with the results as we step out in faith to be obediant to what He asks of us. The results are always His!
God is dope,
Israel
Friday, March 18, 2011
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
Lesson taught: Lesson learned
Soooooooooooooooooooooooooooo, a few days ago I was in a convo with a brother that I've been walking with for a minute, who is currently in a raw place, he's facing a lot of difficult stuff right now and it's been a hard and bumpy road for him. As he was venting his frustration and feelings to a brother who "should" have been understanding I got frustrated and irritated with him. My mind frame was MAN UP! God put you into this situation for a reason, pull up your panties and go hard or go home! I even threw some Bible principles at him, and at that time he was like, Israel I don't want to hear that! And I had an attitude like it's the truth (which it is) you need to. Needless to say that convo ended with me feeling like he needed to get over himself and pass this stuff.
Well, it's funny how our God has a sense of humor! Lately, as I've been in a place of depletion I've been struggling, especially with carrying a heavier load being that my wife has been sick on bedrest. I've been up at 6am and down at 12am with what seems to be little to no rest in between (Atleast it feels that way!). And it's been harder with me being at work and going in a 6pm (10pm on mondays!) Well, today was a loooooong day, I was up at 7am and didn't have to be to work until around 9:30pm and I was irate over that. I was mad at the world, I just wanted my day to be OVER!
So, I was giving my wife and everyone else (including God) attitude because of the fit I was having. I went into work and was just mad! I didn't want to think about all the good, just, noble, honorable, and peaceable things. I wanted to soak in my misery. And as I was talking to God I felt him say, Ronnie was in this place the other day and you had no sympathy or understanding. And a scripture popped into my head:
Galatians 6:1
"Brothers, if someone is caught in a sin, you who are spiritual should restore him gently. But watch yourself, or you also may be tempted."
And I went to it and the principle within this text humbled me! It's not that Ronnie was caught in a sin, he was just struggling with seeing 20/20, but I wasn't dealing with him in gentleness and lo and behold I find myself in his shoes 1 day later! It's a principle to deal with people in a spirit of gentleness and to watch yourself because you never know when or if you will be right where they are! Again, I was floored and I recieved that lesson from God, and at recieveng that my mood began to change and lighten up.
Although not all the way out I was progressing, when my wife texted me and asked how I was doing. So I told her I was better and I explained to her what was going on with me. So, she sent me a text back like I love you and I'm praying for you. And honestly, I didn't want to hear the "religious" stuff! I just didn't want to hear that! So I responded, ok. And she responded, "A I love you back would have been nice." So I texted her back and said to her that I was still aggy and really wasn't in the mood. And she respondd back it's ok, I understand. I have my days too.
That statement bought a smile to my face and joy to my heart! That was the best thing she could have said and she doesn't even know it! (Well, now she does! lol). But that ministered to me, more than her saying I'm praying for you. God blessed me through that! I needed and wanted understanding, not someone to beat me up with scripture or to get "spiritual" on me. And that's exactly what Ronnie needed the other day. But I got all "deep" on him.
Well, it was a lesson taught and a lesson learned! God used my junk to teach me a invaluable true. I'm thankful for tonight, and as I'm thinking now I'm reminded of another scripture from Hebrews 4:15,
" For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet was without sin"
Jesus doesn't just smack us with stuff that's too deep, he sympathizes with us and our weaknesses and gives us what we need. He didn't tell me tonight to MAN UP and pull my panties up! He ministered to me in gentleness and in a way that I could receive it. Thank You Lord for that!
So, what about you? Are you like I was to Ronnie? Always ready to beat someone with a scripture instead of going to them in gentleness and seeking to understand and/or sympathize with them? Be careful if so, because you might fall into the same snare just as I did!
Until Next Week (Lord willing)
God is Dope,
Israel
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