What's goodie peoples?
About a year or so ago I started a looong decline from the higher parts of the mountain down to the low valley. A strenuous hike it has been! It has gotten more and more intense as the minutes turned into hours, the hours into days, the days to weeks, the weeks to months and now the months to a year. ( Hopefully the year won't turn into years! lol)
But during this time, I have lost A LOT of what I thought I had, a lot of my passion, desire and zealousness (at least how I understood it). I've lost companions, I've lost doctrinal stances/dogmas, I've lost a lot of things but I've also gained some things......
I've gotten past all the religious masks etc down to me... just me... and a lot of the stuff I see is... well, lets just say nasty.
It's safe to say I've been stripped down bare, butt naked..... To the point where ALL I have and ALL I cling to is Jesus and HIS atonement... Nothing more, nothing less.... Faith in Jesus is it!!
Now, one may say this is a GREAT thing! And I believe that to be true, ALTHOUGH it doesn't FEEL so great. It has constantly felt like I have been perishing through this period, like I have been rotting away, being eaten alive from the inside out.
I don't know if any of you have ever felt that way, it's not a good feeling! Lol. I felt as if I was holding on with all I had but one by one my fingers kept loosing grip, and I feared that one day I would just all together lose grip and fall away, until...........
Mark 4:
On that day, when evening had come, he said to them, "Let us go across to the other side." 36And leaving the crowd, they took him with them in the boat, just as he was. And other boats were with him. 37And a great windstorm arose, and the waves were breaking into the boat, so that the boat was already filling. 38But he was in the stern, asleep on the cushion. And they woke him and said to him, "Teacher, do you not care that we are perishing?" 39And he awoke and rebuked the wind and said to the sea, "Peace! Be still!" And the wind ceased, and there was a great calm. 40He said to them, "Why are you so afraid? Have you still no faith?" 41And they were filled with great fear and said to one another, "Who then is this, that even the wind and the sea obey him?"
I always knew Jesus was with me through this, I saw HIS hands all over but HIS presence wasn't as close as it has been before.... I identify with the disciples, I felt (and still do A lot of times) that HE was (is) sleeping, while I was perishing............ But Jesus comforted and encouraged me one day by showing me how he just got up when they woke him and rebuked the winds and great peace came..
HE asked them why were they so afraid.... HE wasn't worried about it, neither should they have been... And that gave me GREAT comfort and hope!! Jesus was carrying me, HE was right there with me, protecting me and with HIM I have nothing to worry about... At any given moment HE can demand all the storms to stop and at the drop of a dime they will!!
Now, HE hasn't done that in my life at this moment, I'm still faced with tons of storms, I still feel a lot of times like I'm perishing, but no longer like I'm loosing grip.... I know that I'm with Christ and HE is carrying me and holding me...
God is Dope!!
Dooch
P.S.
Maybe the perishing is just the pruning that John 15 speaks about....... Maybe it is, maybe it isn't, I guess I may know in hindsight. Until then, I'm clinging to Christ!
Tuesday, November 29, 2011
Monday, November 28, 2011
Monday, November 21, 2011
Sunday, November 20, 2011
Wednesday, November 16, 2011
Catching Up
Catching Up
Soooooo, it's been a long while since I touched down with a blog..... Well, I've missed ya'll too! lol :)
A lot has happened within the past year, so here is a blog on me helping you all catch up with me. On June 7, 2011 my wife had our 4th child, Joshua Emmanuel Cook. He was born healthy and beautiful, and he was the last of our family. We were done having kids...... Sad to say on August 8, 2011 our baby boy died, unexpectedly and unannounced from SIDS... His death has caused us to go on a CRAZY journey spiritually, hanging on the cross of Christ for our lives..... We've been through A LOT!! My wife has had about 7 miscarriages throughout our 10 years together, but losing our baby that we held, kissed, changed, bathed, smelled, hugged and so on was TRULY different.
It's been a process that we have been walking out towards healing, a HARD arduous experience.
Other than that, all of you or some of you may know that I've been on my music grind hard. I put out "Certified" my first mix tape in January of 2011 and now I'm on schedule to release my second mix tape "My Lot" on January 1, 2012. With the first video and single off the mixtape debuting on November 21..
This process has been EXTREMELY hard as well, starting and building from the ground up isn't a easy thing. People have a hard time giving unknown artist or "nobodies" a chance of which I fall into that category. So all around it's been a VERY hard journey for me through this past year.
Concerning my faith....... I've reached a place where I look at where the church (the western church) is and I'm disgusted. I'm not satisfied with what I see and I want more of what true christianity is. I don't want to be involved with a lot of the stuff I see and or hear, I don't want to be around the fakes and the phonies, I don't want to be around the pharisees and sadduccees, I don't want to be around the zealouts who have no grace, mercy or compassion. I realize more and more just how sick I am and how much I need a physician to heal me and save me. And Jesus is that doctor. I realize more and more how I have NOTHING to offer HIM, even my body isn't much of anything unless HE stirs me up and uses me HIMSELF!!!
So, here's a quick catch up, just like 2 Corinthians 3:3 says, " Your very lives are a letter that anyone can read by just looking at you. Christ himself wrote it—not with ink, but with God's living Spirit; not chiseled into stone, but carved into human lives—and we publish it."
So, here I am, again, the good, the bad and the ugly all wrapped up into a fallen body that has been redeemed by the perfect one -JESUS..
But through ALL this trouble and turmoil, I have one thing that I do know and it's set in concrete, and that's
GOD IS DOPE!!!!!!!
Soooooo, it's been a long while since I touched down with a blog..... Well, I've missed ya'll too! lol :)
A lot has happened within the past year, so here is a blog on me helping you all catch up with me. On June 7, 2011 my wife had our 4th child, Joshua Emmanuel Cook. He was born healthy and beautiful, and he was the last of our family. We were done having kids...... Sad to say on August 8, 2011 our baby boy died, unexpectedly and unannounced from SIDS... His death has caused us to go on a CRAZY journey spiritually, hanging on the cross of Christ for our lives..... We've been through A LOT!! My wife has had about 7 miscarriages throughout our 10 years together, but losing our baby that we held, kissed, changed, bathed, smelled, hugged and so on was TRULY different.
It's been a process that we have been walking out towards healing, a HARD arduous experience.
Other than that, all of you or some of you may know that I've been on my music grind hard. I put out "Certified" my first mix tape in January of 2011 and now I'm on schedule to release my second mix tape "My Lot" on January 1, 2012. With the first video and single off the mixtape debuting on November 21..
This process has been EXTREMELY hard as well, starting and building from the ground up isn't a easy thing. People have a hard time giving unknown artist or "nobodies" a chance of which I fall into that category. So all around it's been a VERY hard journey for me through this past year.
Concerning my faith....... I've reached a place where I look at where the church (the western church) is and I'm disgusted. I'm not satisfied with what I see and I want more of what true christianity is. I don't want to be involved with a lot of the stuff I see and or hear, I don't want to be around the fakes and the phonies, I don't want to be around the pharisees and sadduccees, I don't want to be around the zealouts who have no grace, mercy or compassion. I realize more and more just how sick I am and how much I need a physician to heal me and save me. And Jesus is that doctor. I realize more and more how I have NOTHING to offer HIM, even my body isn't much of anything unless HE stirs me up and uses me HIMSELF!!!
So, here's a quick catch up, just like 2 Corinthians 3:3 says, " Your very lives are a letter that anyone can read by just looking at you. Christ himself wrote it—not with ink, but with God's living Spirit; not chiseled into stone, but carved into human lives—and we publish it."
So, here I am, again, the good, the bad and the ugly all wrapped up into a fallen body that has been redeemed by the perfect one -JESUS..
But through ALL this trouble and turmoil, I have one thing that I do know and it's set in concrete, and that's
GOD IS DOPE!!!!!!!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)